Genesis 31: Jacob Gets Out of Dodge
Not surprisingly, Laban and his sons are a bit angry because Jacob has amassed an amazing amount of sheep and goats by tricking Laban into giving him the speckled ones. Jacob has God (and, strangely enough, genetics) on his side. Apparently, there is some evidence for selection and evolution. The Lord sees the trouble brewing and tells Jacob that he better get out of there. Jacob gathers his wives, Leah & Rachel, to him and tells them that they have to leave — giving them a sign that God has blessed him despite Laban’s trickery:
You know that I’ve worked for your father with all my strength, yet your father has cheated me by changing my wages ten times. … So God has taken away your father’s livestock and has given them to me. (6–9)
I’m not sure why Jacob is turning to his wives for sympathy — recall that both of them were the wages that Jacob is referring to. It must hurt to be Leah in this conversation. Additionally, is it true that God has taken away the flocks? I suppose it is true because the whole “place white sticks in front of mating goats and sheep” probably doesn’t do anything. But it seems to me that it is Jacob who has taken away Laban’s flock. He’s just trying to bolster his right to leave and keep the flocks by claiming that God is on his side.
Leah and Rachel admit that their father has sold both of them and used up his estate, giving them the right to the wealth taken away from Laban. They pack up on camels and head towards Canaan to Jacob’s father, Isaac. This came as a bit of a shock to me because I really thought Isaac should have been dead by now. Wasn’t he worried that he was dying (his eyesight was going) earlier when he gave his blessing to Jacob? That was at the very least fourteen years ago and likely many more — given all of the sons that have been born to Jacob in the interim. Why on earth is Isaac still alive? [Note, in verse 38 we find out that he has been there for twenty years.]
In a bit of a strange twist, on their way out of town, Rachel steals her father’s household gods! It’s a strange pagan reference that inspires many questions. Why does Rachel steal them? Was she trying to hurt her father? Did she want them for her own worship? If the latter, did Jacob know about it?
Laban Rounds Up a Posse and Pursues Jacob
Laban finds out what has happened and he rounds up all of his relatives and takes off in pursuit of Jacob. He catches up with Jacob seven days later and asks him why he ran off with his daughters and his idols. He lays it on pretty thick, pretending that if Jacob had just told him he wanted to leave, then he would have threw him a great party and kissed everyone goodbye. That’s obviously a load of crap, given that Jacob has tried to leave before without success.
Jacob is surprised by the accusation that he has stolen Laban’s household gods. So he makes a bold promise to kill anyone who is found with them — confident that Laban’s search will come up empty. Big mistake. Fortunately, Rachel turns out to be as cunning as Rebekah. She hides the gods in her camel’s saddle and sits on them. How does she explain why she can’t get up?
Rachel said to her father, “Don’t be angry, my lord, that I cannot stand up in your presence; I’m having my period.” So he searched but could not find the household gods. (35)
Wow, this is probably the earliest documented case of the “period defense.” Just blame it on the period. Hilarious. Why are we told about this incident at all? Does it serve just to show us how cunning Rachel is? Nothing is immediately made of the fact that Rachel is both a thief and a liar.
Jacob gets mad at Laban and basically tells him that he’s served him well for twenty years, putting up with a lot of crap. He deserves everything he has. Laban suggests they make a covenant and they pile up some stones, promising not to intrude on one another’s land. Laban then kisses his family and returns back home.
Genesis 32: Jacob Prepares for Judgment Day with Esau
Unfortunately, it appears that Jacob has to pass through the land of Esau, the very same brother that he screwed on several occasions through deceptive means. He sends a messenger to humbly greet his brother and the messenger comes back with the message that Esau and 400 men are riding to meet him. Thinking that his brother is coming to attack him, Jacob divides his camp in two to prevent a massacre. Then, he prepares gifts of sheep and goats for his brother and sends them along head so that Esau will receive them before reaching the main camp. Apparently, the plan is pacification and appeasement.
Jacob Wrestles God for No Particular Reason
In a strange tangent from the storyline with Esau, Jacob is camping in preparation for meeting Esau, the following occurs:
So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touchéd the socket of Jacob’s hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. Then the man said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak” (23–26)
This seems like the kind of random cut away that occurs in a Family Guy episode. Why does this man wrestle Jacob? Why does Jacob accept the invitation to wrestle for hours on end? Is that even physically possible? Who does that?
If it is God who wrestles him, why does he cheat by wrenching Jacob’s hip? Apparently, God is not a very fair sportsman. After they are done tossing around all night, the man blesses Jacob:
“Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome” (28)
Jacob now has a limp and we are told that this is why the Israelites do not eat the “tendon attached to the socket of the hip” (32).
Genesis 33: Judgment Day with Esau
Okay, so I lied: it really isn’t judgment day. I was just hoping that Esau was going to get some sweet revenge for all the crap his brother pulled on him. I mean, God has been rewarding schemers and deceivers, so why not think that Esau should get his turn?
At the moment of expectation, no fighting occurs. Instead, Esau is actually happy to see Jacob. He even tries to dismiss the gifts that Jacob sent to him in order to appease him. All around, he seems like a great and decent guy. I guess he’s just the trusting dupe who God punishes for being stupid.
Jacob Deceives Esau…Again
I really do not understand what happens next. After Esau has greeted him with acceptance and kindness, Jacob tells his brother to go on ahead without him and that he will be along in a day. Esau offers to escort him or to leave some men to help him, but Jacob refuses his help and protection. As soon as Esau is gone, however, Jacob takes off in another direction!
So that day Esau started on his way back to Seir. Jacob, however, went to Succoth, where he built a place for himself and made shelters for his livestock. (16–17)
Why doesn’t he follow his brother? It seems clear that Esau was not trying to trick his brother in any way — his decision to bring 400 men seems motivated out of a desire to provide his brother with safe passage and protection. What are we supposed to take out of this story? It’s another example of a brother screwing over a brother, but what makes this instance particularly ridiculous is the fact that there appears to be no motivation for the evil.
Genesis 34: Dinah Gets Raped and Everyone Dies
Remember that daughter of Leah’s who managed to make it into the Bible, miraculously, despite being a girl? Well, we finally found out why she was fortunate enough to get a mention — so that she can get raped a few chapters later. She’s walking around one day when Shechem, ruler of the area, sees her and rapes her. He claims to be in love with her and wants her to be his wife. Apparently, he just doesn’t express himself very well.
Jacob finds out about his daughter being defiled and Hamor comes to talk over the terms of sale for his daughter. He suggests that the two families intermarry, agreeing that Jacob may settle in the land and trade in it. Just name the price.
Jacob’s sons deceitfully reply that they cannot hand over Dinah to be married to any man who is uncircumcised. The price for Dinah will be for Hamor to agree to circumcise all of his men. Because Hamor and his men are eager to gain control of Jacob’s livestock, property, and women, they eagerly agree to circumcise themselves. What happens next is, well, Biblical:
Three days later, while all of them were still in pain, two of Jacob’s sons, Simeon and Levi, Dinah’s brothers, took their swords and attacked the unsuspecting city, killing every male. They put Hamor and his son Shechem to the sword and took Dinah from Shechem’s house and left. The sons of Jacob came upon the dead bodies and looted the city where their sister had been defiled. They seized their flocks and herds and donkeys and everything else of theirs in the city and out in the fields. They carried off all their wealth and all their women and children, taking as plunder everything in the houses. (25–31)
Okay, wow. They use the Lord’s sign, circumcision, as a way to weaken their enemies and then systematically slaughter every single male for the action of a single man, Shechem. Don’t get me wrong: I think that rape is horrific. But does it warrant the death of an entire generation of men? Additionally, Jacob’s sons carry off all the wealth and women in retaliation — so it’s not exactly a move on behalf of women’s rights. Is this justified?
Jacob seems upset by it, not because it was wrong, but because it is likely to make trouble for him among the locals. It’s nice to see that he has his priorities straight.
Reflections
I’m really puzzled by the interaction between Jacob and his brother Esau. Esau has plenty of reason to be upset with Jacob. Yet, he seems to turn the other cheek and do the Christian thing: he forgives his brother and receives him with open arms. Now, I realize that the Old Testament is not technically “Christian.” But why should its values be so radically different? In Genesis, people are rewarded if they happen to be more deceptive than their peers. God doesn’t seem to smile upon the “nice guy” who turns the other cheek. Instead, he punishes those who let others get the best of them. It’s no wonder that siblings are so terrible to one another in Genesis: God is apparently stoking the fire with his approval and disapproval.
Finally, I’m really curious why an entire generation of men can be cut down in retaliation for a rape without it meriting any mention. This seems like precisely the kind of event that is in need of some words from the Lord. Once again, the deceivers seem to get all the reward and God turns a blind eye to the wanton violence.